It seems that no matter how hard I work at it, I cannot seem to make this blog about my Love. I find it, but it is always short lived. It’s never unconditional. I always end up lamenting where it all went wrong, and wishing I had just not bothered.
Which is where I’m at presently; despite her continued presence in my life. She has said she will stay until she cannot, that she cannot stay until I fully transition. She Loves me, just not Unconditionally. So maybe love with a lower case L would be more apropos. Regardless, she loves me, she loves everything I bring to the relationship table. She understands that everything she loves about me stems from Cadence. But she fell for what’s left of my masculinity. That’s what she wants, and unfortunately, I cannot promise that for much longer.
So rather than lose me immediately, she wants to hang onto me, let me keep her company, be wooed and dated by me, until the presence of Cadence pushes her out or away. I’m good enough to date; not good enough to Love. Once again, Love just isn’t enough.